Shorty's Pub - New York, NY

RETURN? Maybe to watch a sports game (who am I kidding, I don't watch that garbage)

"This the best philly cheesesteak in NYC u guyz!" is what several of my friends, and plenty of Yelpers, have claimed. Okay then, I thought, I love cheese, I love steak, I don't hate Philadelphia (cream cheese), so why not give it a shot? How bad could it be?

I found myself one lone Friday night, with nowhere to go and no one to see. Instead of crying into my Heinie Light (listen, gotta maintain the waistline), I figured, Eff it. Let me order that cheesesteak and see what this is all about.

The menu offers either a chicken or beef cheesesteak, with a choice of cheese (American, Monterey Jack, or Provolone.) I opt for the beef Provolone.

I'm waiting...

Waiting...

Still waiting...

..And finally, she emerges:

 Philly Cheesesteak with Provolone

You guys, it was dry. The flavor was nice, don't get me wrong. French baguette had been used, it had a decent crunch upon first bite and the inside of it was pillowy and chewy. The meat was good, too: it had some fried onions, and was clearly well-spiced with a "kick," my guessing being cayenne, black pepper, salt (obvs), probably some garlic powder... but something was missing. A certain je-ne-sais-quoi, you might say. It wasn't dripping with oil, the cheese flavor and amount was "conservative" and it just wasn't a real philly cheesesteak that I have come to know and love. It was a philly cheesesteak-like sandwich, and it would satisfy your craving in a pinch, but I'm sad to report that it's just not the real deal.

Don't get me wrong, it's a good sandwich, decent sandwich. If you happen to be at Shorty's and you're hungry, go ahead and order it. But heed my fair warning: Cheesesteak, it is not. 

ADDRESS: 1678, 1st Avenue, New York, NY 10128

Wa Jeal - New York, NY

RETURN? Yes 

Every week I live in anticipation of Wa Jeal Wednesdays. Now, what's that, you ask? It's simply the only day of the week when I allow myself to order in. As you can probably tell by the name, I always occasionally opt for Wa Jeal Sichuan Chili House. This place is the bomb diggity. It's not perfect, mind you, but it gets the job done and it gets it done well.

I always sometimes (as I'm a very serious food blogger, and not a ravenous, stubborn, childish Wednesday glutton) order stir-fried chicken with spice roasted chili. The price is definitely right (considering it's smack-dab in Manhattan) and it's usually delivered within 20 minutes.

Once the delivery man-lady-boy-thing hands me that warm brown bag I can't even think straight. A fully-outfitted clown could deliver it and I wouldn't notice. When I de-lid the round plastic bowl, this is what I see in all its oily glory:

                                                                   Isn't she lovely?

O that mind-and-mouth-numbing Sichuan peppercorn! You have become my tastiest addiction.

Mind you, this dish has its shortcomings. First of all, the chicken is always overcooked to the point of being dry and rubbery. I'm ashamed to admit that I love my meats dry and chewy, but I know and understand why the average person would find it unappetizing. Also, I don't know why they use so much oil, but the bottom of the plate is replete with nasty, smelly, slimy, chili-infused, heavenly, blessed oil that I may or may not mix in with my rice.

I love you, Wa Jeal Wednesdays.

ADDRESS: 1588 2nd Avenue, New York, NY